Progress

I understand that change is necessary in life. Essential really. Sometimes I wonder though, how far our Earth, our landscape bends to change. Today, I was riding my horse through what had been a beloved forest. As I crested the hill a gruesome sight met my eyes. To the left there were two new (many storey)condo buildings, and to the right, a forest decimated by clear cut logging. I have to admit my heart sank a little. A forest that I had run through, walked through, ridden my bike through, was nothing but a pile of freshly mown down trees lying on the ground like casualties of warfare. I understand the cycle of life, and need for change on this Earth of ours, but I really start to question how far is too much? How long will it be before all our old haunts and rambles in the woods are nothing but a memory to be found on the pages in a history book?

Horseback Riding Uses Every Muscle

Horseback riding engages almost every muscle. I know this because my body is telling me so today. And I believe there is such a thing as good sore and bad sore. This definitely is a good sore. I called upon muscles that were laying dormant for many years wondering if they were going to be used again.

They are speaking to me today. Not screaming, but letting me know that they are alive and kicking and need to be eased in, or at least stretched afterwards. So after each day of riding, I will make sure I give myself time to stretch and breathe. Because I'm riding on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday (or when the sun shines), I was thinking even going to do a steam and stretch afterwards might be a good thing for my body.

Achy muscles aside, it truly was so wonderful to be back in the saddle again. 45 minutes of pure bliss. It's nice when you refer to an exercise as pure bliss. Good for the body and the soul.

The Awakening

A time comes in your life when you finally get it. . . when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH!

I had small pieces of that over the years, but a really big one last night.

I'm tired.

Tired of eating too much.

Tired of exercising so much and it not making a difference because I'm eating too much.

Tired of carrying around baggage and heaviness that's weighing me down.

Tired of feeling sore because my muscles don't work like they used to.

Tired of not having the will power to not have that cookie.

Tired of not making time to achieve my goals.

Tired of making my goals, and then not following through.

Tired of always beginning, but never finishing.

Tired of the regret, guilt and underlying sadness that come with not finishing.

Tired of being tired.


Today I am not beginning again, but continuing on my journey. A journey to where I've had to dig pretty deep within my layers (that I have padded up over the years) to find out where I am. Who I am. Where I want my life to go. How I want to live it. It's amazing how we can lose ourselves in the every day. We can go through the motions of life, and never really live or connect.

When talking about why we got ourselves to this spot in out lives, a friend said, every time you have a hurt, a piece of you dies. I thought about that for a long time.

I do not believe part of you dies when there is a hurt. I believe that whenever we are hurt, inflicted by either someone else, or ourselves, we cocoon. Wrap ourselves in layers upon layers of protection like a chrysalis, under development, until it's time to break free and spread our beautiful wings.

I feel that the time for breaking free is near. Is now.

It's time to work hard to break free of the layers that has kept me protected all these years. I have gathered the strength, and know that it is going to take time to remove them one at a time, one pound at a time. It took a long time to get them there, but I cannot wait to feel the air, and spread my wings.

New Year

My husband and I took a mini vacation to the West Coast of Vancouver Island for New Years. We stayed at a beautiful place called Terrace Beach Resort that is nestled on the edge of The Wild Pacific Trail in Ucluelet, BC. While we were there we hiked awesome trails and combed beaches, and soaked in the fresh air. It was an awesome way to bring in the New Year. I admired the people surfing , and look forward to the day when I am healthy and strong enough to try it. It's so awesome to have so many things to look forward to.

When we were there we made collages about our goals for the upcoming year. I'm really looking forward to all the wonderful things that this year will bring.

Making Better Choices

I haven't been on Sparkpeople for awhile. I have been letting my everyday business get in the way of much needed time for myself, and reflection on my health goals. For the last two months I haven't totally slipped off the wagon, but I also haven't been putting me first, or staying true to my goals all of the time. How my body feels right now and the scale really demonstrates that.

But the one thing that has come of all of this, is I'm learning to make better choices. Halloween being one of them. It is a difficult holiday for me eating wise. Only because for last 30 years I have developed some really bad Halloween habits of eating way to much chocolate and candy. But as I am making better choices for my body, there was a definite switch this year with choices. Instead of getting all excited about consuming many little chocolate bars, I was excited about trying a new recipe. Pumpkin Soup. I carved my Halloween Jack-o lanterns for the kids, on Halloween night, and after the candles blew out, and all the trick or treaters went home, I brought the pumpkin inside and chopped it all up and roasted it in the oven.
SO here is my healthy version of Pumpkin Soup to share with everyone. A better choice to mini chocolate bars that your body will just love.

Jen's Jack-o-Lantern Soup

1 Large Jack-o-Lantern cut up
2 onions, chopped
2 cloves garlic, minced
2 cups of carrot, chopped
10 peppercorns
1 large apple, chopped
2 tbsp fresh thyme
1tsp nutmeg
1 cup skim milk
2 cups brown mushrooms, sliced (optional, but I love them)
1 tsp butter
2 litres of chicken stock.

Halloween Night 9pm, cut jack-o-lantern into large chunks and roast in the oven on cookie sheets skin side up for an hour or until flesh is soft. Add a dash of salt and pepper to the pumpkin at this stage if desired.

In a soup pot add onion, garlic, carrot, peppercorns. Add enough chicken stock to cover veggies, and simmer for 30 minutes, checking that stock doesn't all evaporate. Add cooked cubed pumpkin, apple, thyme, nutmeg, add more chicken stock as needed, and simmer for another 15 minutes until all veggies are soft, and almost mushy.


Using hand blender, blend all veggies in pot. Add milk, and remaining chicken stock. Makes a yummy soup, and if you are feeling a bit decadent, a nice slice of brie cheese at the bottom of your soup bowl, sets this soup alive!

Mushrooms Optional - cook sliced mushrooms in a separate pot with the 1 tsp of butter and 3/4 cup of chicken stock. Simmer until tender, then add mushrooms and stock to soup, after it's blended. Adds a yummy earthy flavour to soup!

Am really glad I am breaking out of a 30 year tradition of chocolate binging, to make better, healthier, choices for my body.

Time to Refocus.

I promised myself that I would write a blog entry this morning, and so here I am.

It has been an incredible start to my school year, but also the worst.

Let's start with the good part first. I finished my Masters Degree. 2 years of really hard work came to a conclusion on Friday September 18th when I passed my Masters panel. I was extremely proud of myself, and earned My Masters degree in Educational Leadership. Then I went into celebratory mode, of the old kind. And when I say that I mean going back to my old eating habits. Desserts, heavy rich foods, and neglecting to log into Spark, with the attitude, oh I 'll start again tomorrow.

Well 11 pounds later, one month later, I feel awful. My body feels heavy, bloated, and I lack the energy that I once had. I haven't exercised properly for two weeks, and I feel like I have really wasted this month when I could have been losing 11 pounds and and be closer to my goal.

But the feeling sorry for myself stops here. The yoyo stops here.

The first thing I am going to do is track my food. That tool alone helped me lose weight when I couldn't exercise, last May when I injured my back. I know for a fact, when I eat a healthy balanced diet full of vegetables, proteins and carbs, I lose weight.

SO step one, track food.

I am also more successful at losing when I exercise. Not to mention that my energy level goes up and I just plain feel better. The one thing that has happened since starting school again this September is that I have not made time in my schedule to exercise. I am now teaching full time, and my husband is going to school full time...our days seem so full from 8:00am, right to 4:30pm. So I have to make some time in my schedule each day for some exercise.

Right now I AM my number one priority. I am not going to continue to allow myself to come second in my life, because without a healthy body, life becomes more difficult. I need to look after this in a hurry.

So Step Two: Exercise Plan

M-Run day 45 minutes - on days when the weather is not so good, plan to go to the gym
T - Swim 40 minutes, strength training, 30 min
W - Run 45
Th - Swim 40, Strength training, 30 min
F - Run 45
S - Walk 60 minutes, strength training 30 minutes
Sun -Walk 30 minutes, geocaching, hiking (make exercise date with hubby)

I am making a copy of my plan, and posting it on my fridge and calendar, as well as at school.
I want to lose 20 pounds by the end of November, and with this plan I know it's possible. I am very determined to make a better start to my year.

I just needed to take the time for a reality check. Now off to make a healthy shake to start my day, and ask my husband what we are going to do on our date today. Walk? swim? Canoe? The possibilities are endless, and now after a month long sabbatical, positive.

Inspiration From Terry Fox

On Thursday morning at my school our students took part in the Terry Fox Run. This has been a tradition in our schools ever since I walked the halls as a young student, not a teacher.

Terry Fox was a Canadian humanitarian, athlete, and cancer treatment activist. He became famous for the Marathon of Hope, a cross-Canada run to raise money for cancer research, which Fox ran with one prosthetic leg. He is considered one of Canada's greatest heroes and is celebrated internationally every September as people participate in the Terry Fox Run, the world's largest one-day fundraiser for cancer research.

On Thursday morning, our students gathered in the assembly and watch a short video of Terry from his Marathon of Hope in 1980. His stride was not that of an easy run, for after losing one of his legs from the knee down to Cancer, running was not something that came easily. But Terry was an athlete, and had determination. He had a dream of a Cancer free world, and set to raise money for a cure for Cancer. His stride - hop through Canadian streets was inspirational, and students everywhere were glued to television sets watching to see how far this young man from BC made each day on his journey across Canada. Fox was unable to complete his run, as his bone cancer had metastasized to his lungs. X-rays revealed that Fox's right lung had a lump the size of a golf ball and his left lung had another lump the size of a lemon. He was forced to stop the run on September 1, 1980 just north-east of Thunder Bay, Ontario, after 143 days. He had run 5,373 km or 3,339 miles (roughly 23.3 miles per day) through Newfoundland, Nova Scotia, Prince Edward Island, New Brunswick, Quebec, and Ontario. Eight days after Terry Fox was forced to stop, the CTV television network organized a nationwide telethon in hopes of raising additional funds for the cause of cancer research; it proved so successful that $10.5 million was raised that day. The campaigns were so successful that by February 1981, $24.17 million dollars had been raised and Terry Fox's dream of getting one dollar from every single Canadian for cancer research had been realized.

Terry Fox is today considered a national hero of Canada. He was named a Companion of the Order of Canada, the nation's highest civilian honour, on September 18, 1980 by Edward Schreyer, Canada's then serving Governor-General. Schreyer travelled to Port Coquitlam to personally present the medal to Terry himself.

In June 1981, Fox developed pneumonia, and on June 27, he went into a coma. He died on the 28th at 4:35 a.m., which was his favourite hour of running, a year after his legendary run, and exactly one month shy of his twenty-third birthday. Flags were flown at half-mast on Canadian government buildings across Canada and overseas while tributes poured in to Terry Fox's family who retreated home to prepare for his burial. Canada's serving Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau in his address before Canada's House of Commons said that Terry gave far more to his country than his country was able to give to him. Trudeau also noted that:

"It occurs very rarely in the life of a nation that the courageous spirit of one person unites all people in the celebration of his life and in the mourning of his death....We do not think of him as one who was defeated by misfortune but as one who inspired us with the example of the triumph of the human spirit over adversity."

On July 3, 1981, Terry succumbed to the Cancer which he so ardently tried to overcome. But the Marathon of Hope did not die with Terry. Every September, school aged children all over the world participate in Terry Fox Runs. It is an important part of our history, and culture not only to continue Terry's dream of fundraising to find a cure for Cancer, but also to reconnect to the strength within ourselves to achieve our goals and dreams.

One of my favourites quotes from Terry is this:

"I just wish people would realize that anything’s possible if you try; dreams are made possible if you try. "

When I saw this on the gym wall at school on Friday I cried. I was so moved, even after all these years by a young man who had one leg, Cancer, and who never gave up on his dreams.

So I won't give up on mine. Thank-you Terry for the inspiration that I needed to refocus my dreams of becoming a healthier me, and for everyone that's striving for a goal, just remember anything is possible if you try.